After re-reading over this post and its comments, I am beginning to see that I may come across much differently than I had intended. I wanted this post to update, encourage, and inform. I now see that my words are unintentionally tinged with frustration and not with the care and understanding with which I wrote them. I appreciate questions and concerns--I really do--and know that they are fueled with the desire to understand. I didn't mean for my momentary frustrations speak louder than my helping heart. I apologize for the oversight that may have hurt the feelings of those who care for me and my family.
We are getting ready for our trip to MD for Operation Freedom! And I am super excited!
One of the things I was most worried about for the trip was the plane ride home. When we go on Sunday, Sam will be with us, but on our way back, it will just be the Lummer and I. On my last flight to MD I asked the flight attendant what would be the easiest way for me to travel with a one year old. She recommended that we bring his car seat just in case there is an extra seat--she said " Any flight attendant will go out of their way to make sure a baby is safe in their carseat. Plus," she added, "it will make the flight easier on him, you, and the rest of the passengers. Worst case scenario: there isn't a spare seat, you check the carseat, and hold him on your lap." So, we are following her advice, and bringing the carseat. From many previous travels with Liam, I also know that we need a stroller in the airport. I was nervous about hauling both stroller and carseat through the airports--it's just too much for one small person--especially if she's just had surgery. So, I did some research on the subject. I found many
expensive solutions, but was not willing to pay the price just for this trip. However, God provides. While we were on our Sam's Club date two weeks ago, we spotted a collapsible hand cart that looked strickingly similar to the
expensive airport solution I had found online. And it was only 23 bucks. We went home and thought about it, and returned the next day to see if it could work--and it did! I am SO SO SO thankful this worked out! Now, our car seat doubles as a stroller, and all I need to carry is my purse! It's the little details like this that help us to see God's hand in this process.
As the surgery has become a definite in our plans, and we began telling more people, I get three similar responses.
1st (my favorite): "I'm so happy for you! You are going to love it! I/my friend had one and it was the best decision ever."
2nd (the most common:) : "Do they do transplants!?" I respond, "Get in line." or "
Believe me, it's not as fun as it looks." :)
3rd: "Really?! Why? You aren't that big. Aren't you scared? Are you going to be able to breastfeed?" This response is obviously the hardest to respond to. I usually try to explain the situation, because
I know such comments come from a concern for my well being--which I appreciate. On my
previous post I explain "Why", but for those of your who have these concerns, and for those who are considering this proceedure themselves, I would like to explain :)
"You aren't that big." It actually makes me feel proud when people say this. I may not look it to some, but I have spent many years practicing how to look smaller. Actually, I am THAT big. Reductions can be done on a woman who is a D cup. I am an H--which I jokingly say "H for Heather". Happily, I will be going to a C for Clement :)
"Aren't you scared?" Honestly, it is more scary for me to think of a lifetime with this burden than major invasive surgery. The pain of surgery is temporary, it WILL end and the burden WILL be gone. Think about it on a smaller scale: ear piercing. You can wear earrings with out getting your ears peirced, but it hurts when you wear them. It hurts a little more to have holes put in your ears, but only for a little while. Then the rest of your life you can wear earrings pain free. It's like that, only on a MUCH larger scale (in every way).
"Are you going to be able to breastfeed?"
My doctor says that there is a 85% chance that I WILL be able to breastfeed. The odds are good, but not great. However, I was able to nurse my son for nine months. It was great. I'd love to do it again. But not with large breasts. That part was not so great. And as great a breast feeding is--which it is--there is
no shame in bottle feeding your child. We are blessed to live in an age where it is possible for women who are unable to nurse to still feed their children in their own arms. You can still be a loving, nurturing mother, and use formula. Really. My mom did it. So, if my next child comes along and I need to supplement or use formula exclusively, I don't mind. I know he will enjoy all the picking up, holding, playing on the playground, and chasing around the house that I wouldn't otherwise be able to do, without the surgery. There are good things that are worth risking for greater things :)
While we are getting ready for the trip, I am also getting emotionally ready for the surgery. During my excitement and anticipation, it is important to keep the whole healing process in mind. That first week is going to be intense with many highs and lows. I understand that there will be a great deal of pain, and many moments I'm sure where I may question what I've done. Keeping this in mind before hand, I am told, will better prepare me for those moments of physical and emotional pain.
My doctor reassured me that it takes about 1-3 months for total healing, and 1 year for the scars to fade. Sam and I have a birthday extravaganza planned for my 25th birthday, which is almost exactly 1 month after the surgery. So, there is lots to look forward to during the painful parts. I'll be sure to keep you updated as we go along :)
Thanks for visiting!
